1st person, point'n'click
Setting: Kitchen sink fantasy, Zorkian
Year: 1997
Studio: Activision
Publisher: Activision
Designer: Margaret Stohl
Engine: Z-vision
Platforms: Mac OS, Windows
Rating: 70 %
Story: 7
Gameplay/Interface: 6
Puzzles: 6 (ongoing)
Graphics: 7
Music: 9
Voices: 6 (ongoing)
Packaging: 2 (ongoing)
Fun: 8 (ongoing)
TODO
Walkthrough: Weiterspielen
Review: Nichtlinearität lobend erwähnen falls noch nicht geschehen
Review: The Story weiterschreiben (wenn gespielt)
Walkthrough: Screenshot vom fertigen Hades-Scratchcard-Puzzle
Review: Musikqualität im weiteren Verlauf
Walkthrough: Personen, Objekte und Spells bei erstmaligem Auftauchen fetten (bis Hades okay)
Background: Infobox Other games by (Autor/Firma) mit Jahr (weitermachen)
Background: am Ende Links zu MobyGames, Walkthrough, Downloads
Review: The Verdict (oder anderswo): Beispiele für Humor, ggf. mit Screenshot
Review: Verdict weiterschreiben. Puzzles...
Background: Tabelle der Darsteller erweitern
Rating weitermachen
Walkthrough: Liste wann man wo wofür Punkte kriegt
Background: Kasten: Wertungen der Magazine
Review · Background · Walkthrough
REVIEW
Grand Inquisitor is the third and last installment of the graphical
Zork games that Infocom buyer and gravedigger
Activision released. All three didn't have much to do with the old Infocom
Zork, the only two bonds being that they played in the same universe and that the publisher hoped to wring some bucks out of the licence. After the confusing
Return to Zork and the dead serious
Zork Nemesis there was little hope that the old
Zork magic would ever shine again. To set this straight right at the beginning: It did.
Zork: Grand Inquisitor is a good adventure game and a worthy successor to the old text adventures. Read on for the details.
The Story
Grand Inquisitor plays in the ficticious Great Underground Empire, on the continent of Quendor. It plays 120 years after
Zork: Nemesis (but 120 years before
Return to Zork). The player takes the role of a salesperson for PermaSuck, a company that produces hand-held vacuum cleaners, and arrives at the city of Port Foozle which is governed by the Inquisition since recently. The game starts with a pretty cool intro consisting of a voiced news announcement on the "liberation" of Port Foozle from the "tyranny of magic" by the Inquisition, accompanied by black & white video footage from the early 20th century depicting (sometimes violent) scenes of parades and riots. While the tone of the news announcement is generally funny (really funny, with lots of references to the
Zork universe) the video footage indicates that the game, black humour and all, actually has a serious overtone. The Inquisition, spearheaded by Grand Inquisitor Mir Yannick, is a totalitarian regime, and the nazi innuendos of the intro make it clear that totalitarian regimes are NOT fun. The intro also depicts one of the features of
Zork: Grand Inquisitor: Real actors.
Erick Avari plays Mir Yannick, overacting in a way you only appreciate in very bad trash movies - and video games. So, the tone is set, let's take a header into the game.
"Concerned citizens"...
The story is a bit... zorkish. Like a space opera - it jumps from one hotspot to the next. Also, it's quite old school - find three ancient relics to restore magic in Quendor. Like it's 1985. But hey, that's just the general bracket that sticks the game together. Maybe there's a lot of story waiting in the details. At the beginmning that's unfortunately not the case. The action happening on the screen often doesn't make much sense, and it is only way later that a general picture begins to form. Like, once you know about the background of the game situation and the
Zork lore everything you look back at makes sense, but at the time when you're actually playing the game it's often dubious what's happening. The game tells you what's happening, but it doesn't tell you
why it's happening, and with the
Zork universe being slightly surreal your whole game experience is slightly surreal, too. Get the picture?
Also, part of the
Zork lore is that the game world consists of areas very loosely patched together. Yes, you are in the Great Underground Empire. The GUE vibe is always present. But the individual areas have no connection with each other. Like, you come to a crossing (quite at the beginning), and there's three ways to go. One leads to the GUE Tech university, one leads to the home of the Dungeon Master (who's in our inventory, a great trick to allow for awesome jokes) and one leads to the subway station. These three areas aren't connected in any way, neither contentwise nor visually. They could be totally different game worlds. A connecting bracket is the often subtle, sometimes flat humour. And it's all taking place in a giant underground cave system, though you don't really feel that in a university building or a subway.
TODO: WEITERMACHEN (wenn weiter gespielt)
The Graphics
From a technological point of view
ZGI is a mixed bag. Sure, it was in 3D, and in 1997 adventures still were mostly 2D (
Broken Sword 2 and
The Curse of Monkey Island were released that year, to name two examples). Also, the embedding of FMV snippets looked cool. But then, you could freely look around on the X-axis only, and full 3D games based on the
Quake engine were on the market since a year earlier. Also, FMV adventures weren't exactly the hot shit by then, for since 1994 there had already been games such as
Under a Killing Moon,
Gabriel Knight 2 or
Phantasmagoria. Still, technologically
ZGI was definitely above average when it came out.
From today's point of view the engine is... okay. As with most 3D games, the graphics haven't aged well. On a big monitor they're sort of pixel mud, but you can perceive everything you need to complete the game. It's kinda weird that the free 3D view only works on the X axis, but back in the bad old times that was not completely uncommon, at least for adventure games. Another aspect owed to the game's age is the fact that objects and certain hotspots don't necessarily blend in. Like, anticipating a nice puzzle, there's a stone arch with a golden plaque attached to its archivolt, and the plaque has an inscription in purple - that is simply painted onto the pre-rendered plaque. Or the well near the start of the game - there's another plaque, and a rope, and both have a totally different illumination than their surroundings. Looks pretty weird, but yeah, 1997.
The FMV snippets are... good, in general. The intro consists of b/w news snippets from the 1930's to the 1960's I'd say, and they're good. Also, Erick Avari in b/w. Also good. He and Dirk Benedict are overacting a lot, but subtle play is not vor video games. Most of the other acts act kinda camp as well, but it fits the general, goofy atmosphere. Also, the blending in via chroma keying is done amazingly well. Two thumbs up for the whole FMV thing.
The Interface
The controls are a bit awkward. Nothing you could sue Activision about, but still. The engine (see below) isn't super-intuitive, but you'll get around it after a few minutes. The inventory system is a bit unwieldy, like, you explicitly need to drop newly found items into it, and to use an item you need to exit the inventory screen on the bottom. Sometimes items are treated in a confusing way, like, at one point you get a stash of coins, but you ain't got no stash of coins in your inventory, but all of a sudden there's a bag of coins in the top right corner of your (already slightly crowded) inventory screen, and from there you can take and use individual coins, which you can also drop into your "normal" inventory. Magic spells can be used like inventory items, which is good, but they're separated into high, middle and deep magic which makes no sense in terms of gameplay and by my knowledge isn't even supported by the
Zork magic system established with
Enchanter. That's all minor stuff, so what's my problem? The fact that while nothing is intuitive, also nothing is explained, you have to find out everything by yourself. Once you get the hang you have to admit though that it's reasonably efficient. Also, everything's explained in the manual. It's just that other games managed to provide an
intuitive interface.
Selecting an item in the inventory...
...and applying it to the surroundings.
The Puzzles
The puzzles range, as one can expect. We have quite some obscure try'n'error ones, but if you're used to playing
Zork games you won't call the puzzle police over them. Also, your inventory usually ain't that full, so trying everything with everything is not that tedious. Like, there's a crane in the harbour, and a fish down there in the basin. How to get the fish out of the water? One of the very few items you have with you at this stage is a plastic tray from a mead sixpack, so you use that with the crane, and the plastic tray on the hook is lowered into the water, and comes up again with a wooden crate. Why exactly? Puzzles like this can be found throughout the entire game. They're in line with the
Zork puzzle type heritage, and as I said you rarely ever drag around a huge sack of stuff with you, but still... That could have been done better. Way better. At one time you're onm a platform. There's a mound of dirt. Why is there a mound of dirt on a platform? Don't bother, there'll never be an explanation. You can't dig in it. With your bare hands, that is. By the time you stumble across the mound of dirt you'll have a shovel in your inventory. Yeah
that one works. Inside the mound of dirt you find - a spell scroll. Of course. All of this is still
fun as it's not really complicated and it brings you forward, but when you find the time to think about it - good puzzle design looks
completely different. Ever so often them Activision guys will have you laugh your ass of tho, so while the puzzle design is often, let's nail that down,
horrible, I'll not downvote them too much.
There's one aspect though where try'n'error is exactly what you're looking forward to: The spells. The Infocom spell system is in place since 1983's
Enchanter, and it's a blast since then. Take a base of standard spells (REZROV - Open locked or enchanted doors), add seemingly useless ones (IGRAM - Turn purple things invisible) and downright weird ones (LIDIBO - Make a creature think you're really, really ugly) and let the player run amok. Most spells have a few uses or even just one, but trying to spread total chaos is what makes this concept so much fun. And in the tradition of Infocom, many attempts lead to amusing reactions.
Music and Sound
The music is awesome. Big variety - classic music, some sort of "ambient tribal fantasy", always classic
and fresh. Guess the music is what the game always wanted to be. Three thumbs up here. Same applies to the voice work. We get (mostly) professional actors, and they're usually professional speakers, too, and the technology used was professional, and so the outcome is a highly professional sync. Nothing to complain about here. A good example: Our companion Dalboz comments on pretty much everything he sees, but I never ever got tired of his comments. He's voiced by
Michael McKean, and I couldn't think of anyone more up to the job.
TODO: Musikqualität im weiteren Verlauf
The Box
Since we're talking about a 1997 game there's of course a box. Since we're talking about a
Zork game there's of course high expectations - Infocom had always provided a shitload of "feelies" (gimmicks) with their games, some necessary to play the game (copy protection!), some shedding light on the respective game's background, some stylish, some utter nonsense (
rubber centipedes, anyone?), but always fun. How did Activision handle this lore? Well, could have gone worse.
![](Images/ZGI Box.jpg)
Big box - good! Nothing in it but a jewel case and a bit of paper - bad. Huge Zork timeline - awesome! In total the box can't compare to old "grey" boxes from the 80's but yeah, it's still something. One thumb up.
The Verdict
From today's point of view it's hard to understand what made
Zork fascinating back then in 1980. Well, there wasn't much competition, and that competition that was there got stomped to the ground by Infocom's parser. But what caused the cult-like worship
Zork still receives? Well, the guys at Infocom created a
universe. A weird one - based on fantasy, but with a few technical inventions of today thrown in, and full of humour. Puns, clichés, innuendos. That universe was accumulated over the course of nine text adventures (plus
Return to Zork and
Zork Nemesis). So there's really a
lot of lore
Grand Inquisitor can draw on. That shows.
If you're new to the
Zork universe you'll probably find the game world confusing and quirky. Well, it
is quirky, but when you know about the history and geography and habits and connections of the Great Underground Empire you'll at least snicker every here and there. I, with my PhD in Zorkology, had a blast. Sure, often it's just namedropping, but it reminds me of the bad old times you know? Also, the quirky humour of the game really had me laughing a lot. It's probably an unpopular opinion, but in terms of being funny,
ZGI beats every other game for me. Yes, that includes
Monkey Island.
ZGI has more clever jokes, more surreal jokes, more hilarious twists, and the magic system enables the player to evoke total (yet harmless) chaos. Some Legend Entertainment games also had me laugh a lot, the
Spellcasting series for example, or
Superhero League of Hoboken (all of them Steve Meretzky games, coincidentally), but I'd say in terms of humour
ZGI is still my number one. After 27 years, which is quite an achievement.
TODO: WEITERMACHEN
BACKGROUND
Grand Inquisitor was the third
Zork game that was not a text adventure and that was not written by the original Infocom crew. It's based on the
Z-vision engine that was already used for
Zork: Nemesis and that's obviously named after the legendary
Z-machine engine that was used to create the original
Zork games. The
Z-machine engine provides the depiction of a pre-rendered 3D game world and can include FMV snippets. In 1997 that was a cool thing. The camera can only be rotated on the X-axis, which even in 1997 wasn't that cool any more. There's no free movement, instead you have to click on defined exit points to get to a new location, which was pretty standard for 1st person view games back then, and still is for indie games that can't afford a full 3D landscape. The FMV snippets were sometimes short videos taking up the entire screen (as the intro), sometimes the actors were filmed in front of a green screen and then put on top of pre-rendered game graphics.
Now when there's FMV snippets, you need someone to perform in them. Activision invested into some actual actors. Erick Avari was casted to play the Grand Inquisitor, an Indian-American actor with 10+ years of experience under the belt and appearances in a good dozen of movies and series, e.g.
Star Trek or
Stargate. Then there's Dirk Benedict of
Battlestar Galactica and
The A-Team fame as Antharia Jack. And Oscar nominee and
Better Call Saul star Michael McKean is the voice of the Dungeon Master. Even a side character such as Brog was manned with Earl Boen, Dr. Silberman in the first three
Terminator movies and the voice of LeChuck in
Monkey Island. Quite a cast for a non-AAA video game eh? Hell,
David Lander of
Laverne & Shirley fame plays a
talking torch.
Gamestar mocked that Activision had "emptied out (...) the old television actors' homes", but "to very good effect".
Anything to say about the other people responsible for this game? Director
Laird M. Malamed came from
id Software where he had been involved in the production of
Quake. Later on he became a vice president of Activision. The soundtrack was composed by
Mark Morgan who later on created the soundtracks for the first two
Fallout games and for
Planescape: Torment.
Game character |
Actor |
Might know from |
Antharia Jack |
Dirk Benedict |
The A-Team, Battlestar Galactica |
Dalboz (voice) |
Michael McKean |
Better Call Saul, Short Circuit 2, This Is Spinal Tap |
Great Inquisitor |
Erick Avari |
Star Trek, The X-Files, Stargate |
Wartle |
Rip Taylor |
Home Alone 2, Indecent Proposal |
Brog (voice) |
Earl Boen |
Terminator 1-3, Monkey Island, World of Warcraft |
TODO: https://wiki.selfhtml.org/wiki/HTML/Tabellen/Aufbau_einer_Tabelle
Several characters don't have a visual appearance but are voiced by prominents actors: Michael McKeane (
Young Doctors in Love, Short Circuit 2, Better Call Saul) is Dalboz (and does an awesome job), Marty Ingels (
I'm Dickens, He's Fenster, Pac-Man TV series) is Griff the dragon, and David Lander (
Laverne & Shirley) is a talking torch(!).
When
Grand Inquisitor was finally published the
Zork series was already 20 years old (the original
Zork was presented to the "public" in form of the folks at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology in 1977), making it one of the longest-running game series in history.
ZGI's Mac version came out in 2001. 2011 saw a version running on modern machines when it was released on GOG.com.
Zork: Grand Inquisitor featured something weird: An online mode called "linked play". Players could actually connect via an Activision server and help each other. Sounds somewhat innovative (well, apart from that
MUDs did right that in around 1980) but for some reason (poor execution?) no-one cared, and the service was buried quickly and silently.
The Implementors back at Infocom were never shy to break the 4th wall and drop plays on other Infocom games or the company itself.
Zork: Grand Inquisitor occasionally tries to keep up with this lore. Examples are:
- As in the Zork text adventures the player is called "AFGNCAAP" - Ageless, Faceless, Gender-Neutral, Culturally Ambiguous Adventure Person. Back in that time gendering was not an issue, Infocom simply did it.
- In the pawn shop in Port Foozle there's an old home computer depicting the starting room of Planetfall.
Reviews in general games magazines were favourable.
GameSpot praised the many references to the original
Zork series and stated that the game manages to catch up with the "wit and absurdity" of its predecessors, with a well-written script, "light and fun" puzzle solving, and playful actors for whom Activision "emptied out (...) the old television actors' homes". They criticized the small size of the game world and the short play time (about 15 hours). In total,
GameSpot rated
ZGI as "the best graphical Zork yet, and one of the most consistently entertaining adventures of the year".
PC Gamer jumped on the bandwagon and positively remarked that
ZGI met the "inventive humor and off-beat characters" of the
Zork series well. The magazined rated the gameplay as "standard adventure fare" and criticised some nonsensical puzzles, but generally declared the game to be a "fun and humorous romp though the Great Underground Empire" and a must-play for
Zork fans.
AdventureGamers praised the game as "one of the all-time greats in the adventure genre" (and criticized a few graphical weaknesses) while
Just Adventure positively highlighted the replay value and the humour of the game while bitching about some bugs that required a patch, and the complete uselessness of the online mode.
Sources:
External links:
Wikipedia.
WALKTHROUGH
The game starts above ground, in a forest near Port Foozle. Even here Inquisition has put up mechanical speakers spreading its propaganda. So there's a curfew in place, that's something we'll have to keep in mind. Our inventory consists of a
vacuum cleaner, which makes sense since we are a vacuum cleaner salesperson after all. We're at a T-junction, one path leads into Port Foozle, another leads deeper into the forest and a third one takes us on a seconds-long journey to a monastary on a plateau.
While our main playground will be the city of Port Foozle we're first taking a brief excursion to the monastary (Steppinthrax Monastery, if you're in the mood to google it). It's just one room, and there's just one item, but that one we'll need, so... Go there, check on the notice board, and pick up the
rope dangling from it. Back to the T-junction, and deeper into the forest for a brief visit to a clearing: There's a well with a dark shaft leading downwards. Don't touch it - While we could go down using the rope we'll save that for later as we need a light source first.
![](Images/02%20Seil.jpg)
Back to the T-junction an onwards to Port Foozle. Despite the ever present Inquisition announcements it's safe to explore the "city" (it's just six rooms) as long as you don't touch anything. There's a pawn shop that we'll come to last (but we notice its "lanterns repaired" sign already), a dead end where you'll have to act quickly (so get familiar with the two items of relevance there), a fish shop (that we'll come to first) and a desolate harbour with a crane. Check it all out, click on everything but the fish if you must, and go to the fish shop. Save the game if you have a tendency to repeat stupid actions despite being told otherwise by a walkthrough.
So, the fish shop. There's a huge crate full of ice with a fish on top, and a can of mead. Also, there's a strange device on a pole in front of the shop. When you try to take the fish or the mead, an alarm strikes. Don't try too often or the Inquisition will sack you. The strange device is the key to getting your dirty hands on the merch: It turns the speakers (that blare Inquisition propaganda the entire time) louder or lower. Set them to max (via the green button) and the shop owner won't be able to hear the alarm any more. Pity we can't take the fish, but the
mead can is now ours, and it comes with a free
plastic tray that we store into our inventory (right mouse button) immediately. First puzzle solved!
On to the second, which awaits us in the actual harbour, which is just one room. There's some sort of crane there, and if we play with its controls we notice there's a talking fish down there in the water which considers the harbour its hood. (In case you care for the Zork lore, it's a red goatfish.) So, what to do about it? Well, it's not exactly logical, but at least it's in line with our former coarse behaviour: Litter the ocean by hanging the plastic tray to the hook of the crane and lowering the crane hook afterwards. The red goatfish will get stuck and - no, no fish for our inventory, instead the fish accepts our dominance over the dock (which we never asked for) and puts a crate on the hook (with its... fins? But hey, it can speak, so...) that we imemdiately reel in. The good: Inside the crate is a
lantern, and we've seen enough Zork to know where that leads to. The bad: If the rest of the puzzles is like that we'll have to stick to drinking, and playing the game drunk doesn't exactly make it easier. But let's keep that positive mental attitude: We're done with the harbour, and we got a lantern! Hey, didn't this pawn shop have a "lanterns repaired" sign? On to the next puzzle!
The pawn shop guy (who actually is the famous actor
Antharia Jack, who after having retired ) is somewhat afraid of the Inquisition and refuses to do business with us, or anyone, in his defence. If we show him the lantern though, by using it with the small window in his shop door - totally different story. He ushers us in with courtesy and immediately takes care of our serendipity. While he's busy we need to be quick - on his desk there's a box of complimentary self-heating
cigars, and we help ourselves to one. Taking it triggers another cutscene - looks like the lantern is possessed by some kind of spirit, and Antharia Jack is determined to find out how that can be monetised. He compliments us out of the shop, locks the door, and there we are - no lantern, nowhere to go, and the Inquisition looming above it all. Save your game here if you're a pussy. In case you underestimate the value of the lantern, try to use the rope with the well back out of Port Foozle, and climb down - it's pitch dark, and you're likely to be eaten by a grue. You
will be eaten by a grue, to be precise. So, two goals at hand: We want to go down that well in relative safety, and to do so, we need the lantern back. Whatever additional features the lantern may have. We're still at the beginning of the game, so the solution is at hand: There's only one place with items we haven't dealt with that, and that's our next destination: The dead end left of the initial Port Foozle crossing.
First, there's a barrel there. It's huge, and upon closer examiniation it's enterable. Nothing in there though. Then, there's a sales cart with no vendor in sight but Grand Inquisitor figurines on it. Looks like those have lost in popularity over time. Now, what to do? Any hints? Yeah, two. First, the figurine packaging says those things are highly flammable. Hm. No fire spell at hand, but we've got this self-lightening cigar. Then there's an ad poster on the wall of one of the houses: Looks like Antharia Jack is a fireman (at least an honorary one). So, if we set something on fire, Antharia Jack might be lured out of his shop... Let's try. Use the self-lighting cigar on the figurines - tadaa, they burn like tinder. An alarm goes off. We don't want to be caught in the act and quickly hide in the barrel. Tadaa, cut scene: Antharia Jack arrives on the scene, but then two Inquisition guards show up, mistake Antharia Jack for the arsonist and march him off, despite his fame as an over-the-hill actor. Well, at least his shop should now be available for us to ravage.
And so it is. The shop door is open, the shop is empty. Sadly there's nothing else to loot but our battered lantern - which starts to talk to us as soon as we grab it. Obviously there's some guy named
Dalboz trapped in it, and he wants us to bring him "underground" before he's willing to give us any further explanation. Hm, underground... The well! Now that we have a lantern we should be able to safely explore it. Head out of the shop and the city and pay a visit to the clearing in the forest. Use the rope on the wooden construction above the well, click on the well, and be prepared for quite some explanations that some sort of hologram of the mighty enchantress Y'Gael gives us.
So. Three magic relics. We're supposed to find them. And we have a spell book now, with spells already in it:
- VOXAM - Separates the energies of different magics (whatever that means)
- REZROV - Open locked or enchanted doors (that's a highly usefull spell we know from the old Infocom games)
- IGRAM - Turns purple things invisible (now that's what we love about Infocom magic - we'll surely find a hilarious way to use this one)
VOXAM sounds suspicious, but REZROV is a classic game changer, and IGRAM sounds promising. One last thing before we really start off: To our feet there's a small bucket, and inside the bucket is a
subway token. That one we'll need later, so please pick it up. Now, REZROV that door, and finally we're in the Great Underground Empire. Not a huge amount of rooms to explore at this point, so let's go and check 'em out:
- A tree with purple "fruits" that practically scream "IGRAM".
- An emergency glass case with what seems to be useful stuff
- Easy to oversee: A "thing" on the ground next to where we start our underground adventure. It's a "totem".
- A small door overgrown by some sort of brambles
- A huge stone slab resembling a door
- A weird gramophone-like device
- and the entrance to the Great Underground Subway
Let's start with the glass case. It contains a
hammer, a
sword and a piece of paper. We can open it but almost everything in it is secured by metal staples - not a complete surprise since it's for emergency cases only ("In case of adventure break glass!"). So we probably need an emergency case, or at least to mimick one? The solution is typical Infocom humour. One of the items can be picked up, namely the hammer. Once we have it we close the glass case again and can now follow the "instructions" on it and break the glass with the hammer, which opens the metal staples so that we can pick up the sword and the piece of paper, which turns out to be a
map of the Great Underground Empire and will come in handy for quick travel. The map can't be used on its own, but there's teleport stations spread over the G.U.E. where you can insert the map and select locations you've already visited. Not perfect, but better than walking.
Now check that "totem" thing. Turns out it's actually a dragon,
Griff, who had been
totemized by the Inquisition, i.e. pressed into pellet shape while still being able to communicate. Griff and Dalboz start a light conversation explaining a bit of Griff's back story, and there'll be a time where these
totemized characters (yes, there's more!) will come in handy.
On towards that crossing, and then "left" to a small door overgrown with scrub. Well, we have a sword by now, so let's bring this to bear. A small patch of (underground) land opens up, with the house of our newly found companion Dalboz in the middle. We'll explore that later, but we already take a sneak peek into the toolshed right next to us now. Yay, free stuff! A scroll (with the
THROCK spell ("cause vegetation to grow") and a
shovel - both surely will be useful. That small hut is tempting, but we'll visit it later. Back to the crossing, and left, towards a lonely door in the distance. This is, as we're about to learn soon, the entrance to GUE Tech Uni, and it's sealed shut by a stone slab. By now we know how to handle locked doors, so we REZROV it away. Tadaa... GUE Tech ante portas.
The actual entrance to the GUE Tech building is just a puzzle away now. It's one of these notorious mechanical puzzles though - some love them, some hate them. This one goes like this: There's a huge cylinder, easily man-sized. It has vertically aligned slabs with parts of pictures on it. Each slab has six segments with parts of different pictures on it, in a random order. What you have to do is to turn the slabs until the three of them together form a picture. Oh, and there's three cylinders in total. Well, since it's pretty obvious which slab segment combinations make this, this one's more of a grunt work than of a brain teaser. The complete picture for cylinder 1 looks like this:
![](Images/GUE%20Pillar%201.jpg)
Next up is cylinder 2:
![](Images/GUE%20Pillar%202.jpg)
And here's the last one:
![](Images/GUE%20Pillar%203.jpg)
You probably expected to be able to pass the third trench now, but instead a window opens up
in cylinder #3 that you can enter. Magic, eh? Do so, and you're inside the university. As with all new areas, save the game, explore, restore and let's go.
So that's GUE Tech. A university where you could study magic. Back when that was legal, of course. On the left side (seen from the entrance) there's a notice board with seven notices that we can examine. Well, we've seen enough Infocom adventures to know that at least one of these notes will be important later on, so we read them all and take notes.
Right of the fountain (again, seen from the entrance) there's the entrance to a hallway. That hallway is a little weird. First, it contains a large picture of a nerdish man who, when clicked, starts a speech. Could have been better highlighted, for this is probably the most important speech of the entire game: It explains what we need to do. Three artifacts. Okay, nothing scary so far. Weird, if we continue our way down the hallway we don't seem to be getting any further. What weird magic is this? Back to the entrance of that hallway. Hm, when looking
atthat corridor from the uni entrance we can look up, like, the cursor turns into an up-arrow when we hover it above the hallway entrance. And if we click there we see... a sign. "
Infinite Hallway". And the sign is... purple. Rings a bell? IGRAM that sign and quickly get back into the (now
finite) hallway, and we have a completely different situation: Moving down the hallway now takes us to a crossing. But first, check the entrance of the now finite hallway. There's a portrait of an old dude that, upon examination, starts a broadcast. That old dude, apparently a mighty enchanter named Belboz, tells you it's your job to find those three magic items Y'Gael mentioned earlier in order to restore magic in Quendor. So that's probably what we'll be occupied with for the rest of the game. What items might those be? Back to the crossing at the end of the hallway. Three more hallways (plus the one we came from) lead off from it, and in addition there's a wooden door and some metal lockers. Oh boy.
The door has an opening mechanism we can't do anything with and the lockers are all closed. Which leaves us with the three corridors for now. They're short and empty except for three huge pictures which, upon examination, start more broadcasts from Belboz. They depict the three items we hadda find:
- The Skull of Yoruk, last seen with some Grues near the historical White House
- The Cube of Foundation, rumoured to be owned by Antharia Jack currently
- The Coconut of Quendor, probably in the possession of enchantress Y'Gael
Okay, sounds mediocrely difficult so far, for we've already met Antharia Jack and Y'Gael already, and we know the White House as the starting location of the original
Zork game. But wait... Antharia Jack is locked up in a dungeon in Port Foozle where we can't get back to, the actual Y'Gael vanished from earth years ago, and the White House is in another game that plays in the same universe, but at a different time. Time... Belboz told us we'll have to meddle in time. Okay, that might take some... time. Where to start? The game is not
that linear, so after some secret experiments in the background I arbitrarily rule we start in... hell. One task to perform first tho.
Out of the corridor and back to the uni entrance. As you can imagine there's more to do here later, but for now, get out of the building through the entrance door next to the fountain. Damn, since we
entered uni through this picture on the third pillar, the trench next to it is still there, so we can't leave this way. :( Okay, so turn around and go back to - DAMN, uni's gone! As Dalboz explains it doesn't exist in this dimension. What the... But don't despair. There
is a way out, and it's not even difficult. Go up to this platform and look around, and you'll notice two things: A teleport station (your ticket out of here), and a mound of earth that actually resembles a freshly dug grave, but in fact it's just a bit of uninspiredly placed earth that we can't dig with our bare hands for some reason that remains unexplained. Luckily we're now the "owner" of a shovel, and digging with that one works and reveals the typical content of a mound of dirt: A scroll. The
KENDALL scroll ("Simplify instructions"). Well, we won't complain. Sounds like a one-time puzzle-resolving scroll, but we'll see. Over to the teleporting station. Right now we have a pretty limited choice: Crossroads, or Dungeon Master home. Crossroads it is.
There's this subway station. We can't access it. There's a slot at the entry. We have a subway token. If you still don't get it, examine the token (by putting it on the "examination table" in the top right corner of your inventory. Now, does that ring a bell? Insert the token into the slot, and from now on you got access to the subway.
Feel free to look around. Not very much to see here. The waiting zone at the track doesn't do anything, there's a poster announcing a lottery in Hades, and an overly complicated network plan. Wait, did I say "overly complicated"? KENDALL that thing! Tadaa, just four buttons left. Since we've already read about that lottery in Hades, press that button and walk to the waiting zone right at the track. BÄM! Unconventional, but it works. After a short ride we arrive at Hades subway station.
The place ain't exactly cramped with stuff either. We have the network plan (our ticket back), the entrance to actual Hades (stay away for now) and a skeleton on a bench. Looks like that guy waited for something and forgot time over it. The skeleton's got two books with it: One about hypnotizing yourself - might be that caused its owner's death, and so far I haven't found a use for the sketches in the book. One about the
Voyage of Captain Zahab (pun intended) where the crew tries to salvage a
coconut from the mouth of a savage beast - could that be "our" coconut? Note taken. Third item the skeleton offers: A scratch card. Yay, that's what we're here for! It's actually a mini game that's started by putting the scratch card onto the examination slab in your inventory. Dalboz advises you to save the game, and yeah, that's a good advice. You
can lock yourself out of the game here, by losing the game three times.
The game works like this: You click yourself through some sort of maze, tile by tile, and try to reach the gold sack in the middle. Each tile contains lines, and you have to form a continuous line from the starting point to the gold sack. You do
not have to manipulate the tiles - the game does that for you. All you have to do is avoid dead ends. If you fail, remember until where your path was "good", reload and start again, this time avoiding the wrong tile. For me, the correct path looked like this:
After winning you'll be the proud owner of a 500 Zorkmid note. Before we can go on a shopping spree we need to go into Hades itself - no worries, that's just because right at its entrance (to the left) is a teleportation station. Now where could we spend that money we just won...? Back to GUE Tech! Now down the steps, and re-enter the building through the picture on the column next to the trench.
Vending machines! They accept coins only, but there's an exchange machine which we use with the note. Beware, the resulting stack of coins will not be on your inventory slab, but is instead represented by a bag of coins in the top right corner, from where you can take individual coins, which you can then use just like any other object, or put onto your inventory slab just like any other object. Confusing? Yes. But hey, free money!
Save your game, as you're about to try out a few things that cost money. Might be your stash of coins is enough, but I'm a chicken shit, so I want to keep as much of it as possible. Now where to spend all those shiny coins? There's three vending machines, so let's start with the left one. Three snacks to choose from. Insert a coin and quickly(!) click on the output tray of the snack you want. Try them out - only the right one works. The snack dissolves somehow, but the wrapping paper turns out to be a
spell scroll that we can't GNUSTO into our spell book - Belboz says we need to put it into a spell checker, whatever that is. Okay, into the inventory with it. On to the right machine. Twelve snack slots, only some of them filled, and a keypad with numbers from 1 to 12, with one key broken off. Try some snacks - the damn machine refuses to let go of the snacks! One weird thing is that some time after your futile attempt to get one of those snacks there's some clacking sound
in the distance. Would that mean something? Well,
Tomb Raider 1 came out one year prior to
ZGI, and if you've ever played one of the
Tomb Raider games (or any other game that has a clacking sound in the distance after you've done something) you know that somewhere a door (or compartment) has opened. Look around the uni building - the lockers! Whenever you hit a key on the 1-12 keypad, the corresponding locker opens. Try them. To sum things up, there's only two accessible lockers of interest, namely #8 and #11. #8 contains a book to read - quite some text, so here's a screenshot in case we need that info later.
The other one is locker #11 which was Mir Yannick's one. Four points of interest: A sedative pill which we immidiately pocket. A book on time travel that states that "only spirit forms are able to use the time tunnels" (noted). A leaflet that proves that Yannick cheated during his exams. And a book on creating spells that reads waaay too complicated for me, but we have KENDALL. Apply the spell to the text and the instructions are narrowed down to this:
- BEBURTT Spell:
- * Origination
- * Modification
- * Replication
- * Interpretation
- * Transmogrification
Whatever that means... But at least we know that now. Anything left regarding the lockers? Oh yeah, there's one we can't access because the according keypad key (#6) has fallen off. Now that one's a bit tricky as it involves try and error. If I were you I'd reload now, buy the ice cream sandwich and check lockers #8 and #11 (taking the pill and KENDALLing the spell book instructions), and save again. If you want to try stuff yourself, here's one hint for the road: It has to do with snack #8.
So, in case you wonder how to get into locker #6 - we're gonna blow it up. And we're gonna make us some fine explosives first. It's not intuitive, and I really don't want to know how many people gave up on the game because of this puzzle. There's one hint available: Go back to the notice board in the university centre, or consult your notes about it. It's the top left memo. Zork Rocks and Cola.
Mentos and cola, anyone? So, snack #8. That's the Zork Rocks - the graphics are horrible in terms of figuring that out. Another zorkmid goes down a coin slot. Dammit - our Zork Rocks are stuck! How to get them out of the vending machine now? The solution is a bit weird - use the vacuum cleaner in your inventory with the whole at the bottom of the vending machine, then click the cleaner's "on" switch, and the Zork Rocks will be sucked into the cleaner. Open its hood, get the sweets and leave the cleaner where it is.
Now over to the drinks vending machine. With a little bit of imagination you can make out the words "Blam Classic" on the second button. That's our cola. Save the game in case you have arthritis, for you'll have to be (mediocrely) quick again now. Put your Zork Rocks into the dispensing shaft, spend another zorkmid and press the "Blam Classic" button. Pick up the result, put it into the inventory and rush over to the lockers. Middle row, second from the left. Use the Zork Rocks bomb with the locker door and wait. Get a beer or bring one to the loo, it'll take around 45 seconds until the mixture explodes and reveals the content of the locker. It's Dalboz' one btw. Only one item of interest: Dalboz's student ID. Now where to use that? No hint from Dalboz, unfortunately.
Wait, right next to the lockers there's this wooden door with that strange opening mechanism. Actually it's a card reader. And we have a card. *swoosh* *bing* Tadaa! In we go. Whoah! There's a... lab or something in the distance, but half a dozen free swinging swords menacingly block our way. On the right side there's a teleportation station and a sign - "Protected by the Purple Beast Alarm System". Hmm, purple... If only we could turn purple things
visible instead of
invisible! Maybe later. For now there's nothing else to do but use that teleportation station to return to the Crossroads. Note to self: Location "Spell Lab" unlocked. Sounds good. We're a little bit out of TODO's right now, so let's take another subway ride. Good thing we don't need the token anymore.
Let's see, which destination might be of interest... Ah, the Flood Control Dam #3, a legendary tourist attraction from the original
Zork. Press the respective button and enter the waiting zone. Once you're at the dam station, turn left towards a strange device. According to a plate on the right it's a "souvenir zorkmid press". Well, we have zorkmids, so take one (click on the money pouch in the top right corner of your inventory) and insert it into the device. Voilà - a golden letter opener. Guess we'll find us a letter later on. At this stage (or a minute later, memory fails me) there's a video sequence - Antharia Jack is about to be totemized! So sad. Well, back to our own problems.
When you turn around and walk towards to dam control, you'll find a sewer pipe on the left wall. Examine it closer and your companion Dalboz will inform you it's moss of mareilon, though only a poor quantity. Hmm... Something organic, but not enough of it? Yep, there's a spell for that. THROCK the moss, watch it grow, and pick up the result. Yuk.
Now over to the dam. Check out the control pad and fiddle with it - can't do much wrong. Four gates, one of them closed. Four buttons. Each button causes two of the gates to change their status from open to close or vice versa. A typical mini game - you probably have to close or open all four. Damn, whatever you try, one gate always remains open or closed. Step back and consult the book on the left side. First of all, a new spell! GOLGATEM - Create a bridge over a body of water. Will come in handy for sure. Now read both pages of the book. Oha - if we manage to close all four gates of the dam, it will burst and flood Port Foozle, turning off the electricity supply! We
have to achieve that! Could magic help? Yep, there's a spell for that - good old REZROV. Fiddle with the controls until only one gate is closed. REZROV it so that all four gates are open. Now fiddle with the buttons again - takes some observation, like which button changes which gates, but eventually you'll manage to close all gates. Tadaa - video sequence. Just as Antharia Jack is entering the... totemizator(?), the power turns off. Jack is saved! For now at least.
http://www.gameboomers.com/wtcheats/pcZz/ZGIwt1.htm